I have a lot of things swimming in my head.
For example, innaccuracies in my homestudy, which I just got a copy of today, which is being sent out to children's workers. Our homestudy says we will consider keeping the child's given name... I have no idea where that came from. We did say that if a child was named after a drug (or in Freakonomics fashion, if the child were named Shithead), we would change his name, since we were told that has been known to happen. But... that's not the same as "strongly consider(ing) changing the name or adding a nickname" because we want to "avoid future teasing by other children if there name is too different." No, no, no. To me, it sounds like we feel that every child should be named one of ten things, and anything outside those parameters will be met with legal white-out no matter what. But maybe it will read differently to professionals.
Also, we asked to be certified for 0-18, though we were most interested in 5-16. We were certified for 5-16 only, according to the homestudy. Plus they got The Hub's age wrong (birthdate correct), his job wrong, and it says he was in the military, which he was not.
The recent firstmother-aparent trouble has been very hard for me to read about. I'm not a fan of what goes on in a lot of domestic infant adoption, but I so very much envy there being a possibility of contact with the first family. I wish my kids, whoever they are, would be able to see their parents, get letters, send pictures to them, but it is very unlikely that will be possible. I don't know, it's all zooming around in my head, and part of me is so angry at people who hurt their kids that I can't articulate it well, even though I do think that reunification should be the goal.
I don't really have much more to write. Not feeling bloggy this week, just ready and commenty. But I did begin sewing blankets and dolls this week. Just something to keep busy.
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5 comments:
My home study says I went to a different university than I did. I asked my case worker to change it, but the mistake university is a much better one!
The age range is a biggie, though. That should be correct.
I feel the same as you do with names. Out of all the kids I've inquired about there are only 2 that I would consider changing. One because his first name is awful and he already goes by his nice and normal middle name (I'd just make his middle name his first). And the other because her name is so hippified, but I'd change it (if she agreed) to a very similar sounding name. There are others I wouldn't have picked, but that's who the kids are so the name stays.
I showed my husband that part of the homestudy just now, and he thinks that what is written translates to what we said to a placement worker. I dunno though, and I already sent an email in to our family worker.
But he did back me up on the sentence "William has primarily gained employment experience while in the military." There's no way that could be interpreted to mean, "For the last five years, William has been employed by a company that contracts for the military, where he does scientist things." Nope, just doesn't scan.
It sounds like there was some misinterpretation of the facts. It seems like they should have let you review it for errors before sending it out. I hope you can get it fixed.
In San Diego, I never saw my homestudy. But here, they made us sign off on it. I had them change a few things that I didn't like the way they were worded. I would have them change things if you think it shows a negative light, after all the homestudy is all they have to go by at first.
As far as names go, we gave Bug the choice. Her given name was fine, but it had some bad connections for her so she decided to change it. It is a similiar name to her birth name.
our home study said that wanted a boy of 4 or over - I don't remember saying that. I was awake for nights on end, fretting about the thousands of social workers who would be overlooking us. We actually adopted an 18th month old girl in the end - it just took an open minded social worker who found us.
Ask them to change it - you've got enough to worry about, but it WILL be ok in the end really it will.
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