Thursday, September 14, 2006

Adoption Underachievers

We submitted two more inquiry forms this morning, bringing our grand total of inquiries to... drumroll... ten.

Up until I read Margaret's post, I thought that the 8 we'd submitted (of which 3 seem active, one was ignored, one child was beyond our abilities, and the rest have either been placed/aren't ready for adoption) was a lot. But, um, not so much anymore. Granted, we plan on adopting from our home state, as I think a 6-9 month ICPC might kill me, so our pool is smaller than Margaret's. But reading the advice people gave her in their comments helped a bunch, too. Casting a wider net might be a good idea.

At the moment, the three profiles that seem to be active are all in the same region. This region sends out form letters saying, "Don't call us, we'll call you in 30-45 days," which is more than most, but it still isn't much, but still more than I've come to expect. We're in the 30-45 day timeframe now, so maybe we'll hear something back soon. Two of the inquiries have a good chance of going nowhere, I think from the state's perspective we'll be too noob for the kids. Our homestudy is booooring, not to mention full of errors when it was submitted on the kids, so I don't feel too confident. But there is a child we sent a homestudy in for, a boy who likes bugs and bears an uncanny resemblance to my sister (seriously, if I didn't know she didn't have a child years ago, I'd request a DNA test), that everyone on our end thinks could be "the one." He's the only child our SW has suggested for us, and by the time she sent his information to us, I'd already sent our inquiry. My mother has put this boy's photograph up on her refrigerator, she's sent his profile to my aunt and grandparents, and my dad asks me things like, "Think he'll want to do Boxcar Derby?"

I'm really dreading not being matched to him. I want to be matched to him, but I'd guess there are a lot of people who would also like to be matched to him, and the odds are we won't be, even though I think we'd be good for him.

(That sounded kind of sad and self-defeating, and I didn't mean it that way. So to end on a happier note, here's a photo of me and my sister at our grandparents' lakehouse in 1985. Bikes! Polka-dot swimsuits! Big puppy! Happy!)


Margaret said...

My list of inquiries is out of control. I honestly don't know which is the better method. I think my huge list, where I don't feel that "inexplicable connection" to each of the kids feels a bit heartless at times. In some ways I wish my inquiries were only to the kids I can't get out of my head -- then I wouldn't have some of the dilemmas that I do have.

I don't know. This whole thing is crazy.

(Plus, remember I'm on coast-to-coast search. After all, I was going to travel remote Siberia to go get my son. What's a measly little trip across the US?)

jeneflower said...

I hope you get matched with the boy you mentioned. He sounds perfect for you.